I’M BACK BITCHES. I haven’t blogged in a forever, mainly due to my life being a big ol’ mess, partially because I just couldn’t be bothered. But it’s upfronts season, which means all the trailers for the new shows are being released, which is as good a reason as any to end my blogging lethargy.
So, first NBC who are, to be a kind, a fucking mess. This year, they’ve swept the board of most of their shows, since they pretty much all tanked and judging by the new lot, they won’t do much better this year. They should be thanking the Dutch TV Gods for The Voice is all I’m saying.
Renewals: The amazing Parks & Recreation and Community are the lone comedy survivors (and if you don’t watch them, then please re-evaluate your life choices), whilst on the drama side you’ve got the rather underwhelming line up of Chicago Fire, Parenthood, Grimm and Revolution. Remember these are the shows they’ve saved. Yeah.
Cancellations: Everything else. The New Normal, Go On, Smash (which really did get amazingly crap), Whitney, Up All Night, Deception, plus The Office and my beloved 30 Rock bowed out gracefully. Apparently, they’re still deciding on Hannibal.
The Michael J. Fox Show
I really want to like this, because who doesn’t like Michael J. Fox?! But from the trailer it looks a little… not funny. I mean, it seems nice and warm and cute and blah blah blah but I only noticed about three jokes. Still, I suppose the first episode of anything is never the funniest, and compared to the other sitcoms from NBC this year, it might as well be Fawlty Towers.
Hey have you ever seen Ironside? You know, the 70s cop show about a policeman in a wheelchair? Did you think to yourself “What this show really needs is a gritty modern reboot”? Yes? Congratulations, you’re insane. The trailer actually includes the quote “I have a different view of the world from down here”. Non-ironically. FUCKING. HELL.
Sean Saves the World
I’ll be honest, I hate multi-camera/laugh tracked sitcoms, I find them outdated, obvious and desperate. The only one of recent times that I don’t hate is Miranda, and even that pisses me off with the “WOOOOOO”s whenever someone comes close to kissing because apparently everyone at sitcom tapeings is retarded. Thus, I’m not inclined to like this, but like Michael J. Fox, Sean Hayes (Jack from Will & Grace) is very likeable and a very good actor. But from the trailer, this would look old-fashioned if it came out in 1997.
Welcome to the Family
Rough outline: One family is white! One family is Hispanic! Their children get pregnant! AND THAT’S TERRIBLE. Hilarity ensues, apparently.
Yeah, because if there’s one thing we haven’t got enough of at the moment in popular culture, it’s vampires. I’m really trying not to be negative at this one, since it’s the only one that I could even vaguely be tempted to watch, but the trailer is pretty dull. When a trailer, A VIDEO WHOSE ONLY PURPOSE IS TO EXCITE ME, is dull I’m not about to hold out much hope for the show itself. But it stars Jonathan Rhys Meyers from The Tudors and Katie McGrath from Merlin and I like both of them.
There are various other shows debuting this year (there bloody needs to be considering all of last season’s cancellations), but they don’t have trailers yet. They include a TV remake of About A Boy (groan), a police spinoff of Chicago Fire (groan), various other shit-heaps, but a couple of OK possibilities too. One is Believe produced by Alfonso Cuarón (Pan’s Labyrinth) and JJ Abrams, which has a fairly uninspired synopsis (little girl has psychic powers or something) but those two producers are too amazing to not be a bit optimistic about it, whilst the other is Crossbones, created by Neil Cross, writer of Luther and recent Dr Who episode Hide. It is a pirate show starring John Malkovich. Please re-read that last sentence and ask yourself “That show has to be at least a little bit amazing, right?” RIGHT.