Films and That: A Fantastic Fear of Everything

I don’t like films that are considered “star vehicles”. As in, there are no big actors in any other role (and if there are, it’s in a tiny cameo), leaving the main star to take centre stage. I think they’re lazy, and usually just a quick way for a company to ride the wave of a star’s name to make a quick few quid. Sadly, this is Simon Pegg’s “star vehicle”.

Now, I love Simon Pegg. Ever since Spaced, which I consider (Doctor Who aside) to be the greatest television programme of all time. Seriously. It’s all free to download off of 4oD, and it’d be a considerably better use of anyone’s time than going to see this crap fest. The whole thing rests on his shoulders and despite him being a charismatic and generally very likeable man, even he can’t do anything with this.

It’s apparently based off of a short story, and you can tell that both the director and the scriptwriter consider this to be a really kooky, avant garde piece of work. But it isn’t. It’s boring. Really, really boring. I was in a cinema with literally one other person there, and they walked out half way through.

The plot goes that Simon Pegg’s character Jack is a children’s author desperate to be taken seriously, and so starts researching a book about serial killers, becomes obsessed with serial killers, and thus becomes a paranoid mess locked in his flat. Oh, and he has a fear of launderettes. Guess where he has to go at one point?

It goes on for just over an hour and a half and most of the time is split between Jack by himself in his flat, or his inner monologue in the launderette. And it’s just SO boring. I’ve read into it, and it is supposed to be a sort of comedy, but I don’t think there’s a single joke in it, definitely no funny ones, anyway. And it just isn’t interesting watching a paranoid maniac being a paranoid maniac. There’s a bit of a twist towards the end, but it all just reeks of “MASSIVE, UNBELIEVABLE COINCIDENCE”.

If there is a plus to this film, it’d be either Simon Pegg generally being quite likeable, even if his character is terrible, or the appearance of Amara Karan as a sort of love interest. She played Rita (the best companion who never was) in Doctor Who last year and every time I see her in something, she’s amazing. But she really needs a better agent, to get her away from shit like this, she deserves much, MUCH better.

Basically, this is a boring film that thinks it’s both incredibly clever and funny. It is a waste of money and your time. I wouldn’t even recommend seeing it when it’s on TV. Watch Spaced instead. Seriously though, go watch Spaced.

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About rmdbutler

2007 Brit Award nominee for Best International Female
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